Wish
by Okami gin
Summary: A short Sorato story. Please R&R.


Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon.  
  
Author's Notes: My friend told me this story and they wanted me to make it into a sorato. This is just a short story and it's in Matt's point of view. Now please sit back, relax, and enjoy the fic.  
  
What can I say about the girl I first loved, the only girl I loved since the Digiworld?  
  
That I love the way she laughs at every simple gestures of friendship and happiness, the way she keeps that beautiful smile on her angelic face, and even the way she brightens everybody's day with little effort. Oh how, I wished, every night and day, to tell her that I love her, but now there's no hope in doing so. For now, it's too late. far too late for me to do so.  
  
Sora was my best friend in the whole world; she was the best friend a guy like me could have. She knew all my secrets, which reveals my feelings for her, that I loved her not only her beautiful face but also how she sees life. Even if she was carrying such heavy burdens of life, she still manages to smile sweetly.  
  
I could still remember the time when she helped me through thick and thin in the digital world and when I helped her come back from the dark cave. Deep in my conscience, something told me I didn't deserve her, she deserved someone like Tai. They were the perfect couple. Tai was a dependable guy who loved sports and much as Sora. And here I was, a rebel, the bad boy Ishida always getting into trouble.  
  
After our little adventure in the Digiworld, we became best friends. It was kinda strange that she can see through the barrier of ice that surrounds me. And sometimes she even melts it away, but I put it right back up when someone approaches or when we separate.  
  
What I loved most, however, was how simple acts of kindness makes those pink lips to curve. I remember the time when she lost her first tennis match, and I came over gave her a hug, then I treated her some ice cream, to make her feel better. I even fought a guy three times my size when he was teasing Sora, and I ended up having a bleeding nose and a bruised cheek. Later on, she put an ice pack on the bruised cheek and gave it a get- well kiss, which made me blush so hard that I look liked a tomato with a blonde top. I did everything to make her happy, and to see that smile across her face. Heck, I'd even give her the whole world on a gold platter if she desires.  
  
Her favorite place to hang out was the park. She usually sat under a sakura tree and watch the sun set. She would also bring some snack with her and eat it there. One time, I was going home after band practice and she invited me over. We climbed on a branch, which to my surprise, it supported both our weight. Since then we would both meet there after school and talk about our dreams. I told her my dream was to be a musician and an astronaut, her dreams were to be a fashion designer and to have a great life ahead. I've snuck a peek in her sketch book when she wasn't looking and I knew she could be one heck of a designer. She never laughs at my dreams and pursuits even though they seem impossible. It made me like her even more.  
  
As years went by, I noticed my feelings towards her were slowly changing. I knew I had a simple crush on her since the digital world. But when I started thinking about her every night, dreaming of her and having the feeling I want to be with her all the time, I thought it was something different. Something that made me feel strange, but it was an exciting feeling. It made me feel alive. Whenever our hands touch, I could feel a tingling sensation in my spine and I start blushing. One time during one of our Saturday talk, when she accidentally lost her balance and began to fall off the branch. Luckily, I caught her before she hit the hard ground. For the shortest moment, I had a feeling I never wanted to let her go. I just wanted to continue to hold her in my arms forever. Just wanting to protect her from any harm. I looked at her, looking at how the wind played with her auburn hair. She cleared her throat loudly indicating to me that I was still holding her. I blush, I put her down gently, sadly I let go. She smiled at me and thanked me. Then suddenly, it struck me, I was falling in love with her.  
  
Many times I tried to deny that feeling for I was scared for what would happen if I tell her how I feel about her. I was scared because she might think I'm taking advantage of her and our friendship. I was afraid of losing her. So I kept those feelings hidden or I would push them to the back of my mind because I was scared.  
  
We finally reached the age of seventeen and I noticed Sora growing lovelier each day. Her auburn hair was longer than before and she removed her blue helmet hat. One thing that hasn't changed about her was the innocent beauty that she holds. My heart aches whenever I see boys glance at her angelic face every time she passes by. I wanted to punch their noses when they're talking to her, giving her compliments, flowers, and chocolates. But I have no right to do that. She deserves all the attention she gets. There are times when I watch her in a distance with mixed feelings of anger and hurt because it hurts so much that there so many things I want to tell her but I am unable to do so. There are so many gifts I want to give her but I couldn't because she only sees me as a friend. I was also scared of letting her know how I feel about her as much as I am afraid of losing her.  
  
Then one day, I learned from my classmates that she already had a boyfriend. I was surprise at first because I couldn't imagine that her innocent mind would be able to know the emotion called love, but then again she is the digidestine of love. Then I wanted to laugh and think it was just a joke, but something told me in my mind said it wasn't funny and it isn't a joke. The worst part was, her boyfriend was Tai Kamiya my best friend and rival. He was really popular and being the captain of the soccer team doesn't help any. I was so mad at him and at myself. One thing kept on repeating in my head, why not me? Why not me?  
  
Why not me?  
  
When I saw them walking together at the parking lot one afternoon, I watched her with my heart slowly breaking into a million pieces. I saw her wave at me but I just pretended not to see her for I was scared she might see in my eyes the pain I'm inside because of seeing her with another guy. Those days that followed were the saddest days of my life. My heart aches every time I see her walking down the hallway with him by her side. Every time we meet in the hallways and I see him around her, there's a feeling inside me that makes me want to grab her away from him. How it hurts that the girl I long to possess is now owned by someone else. That special smile I long for her to cast on me was now casted on him. As she passes by me she doesn't know that I whisper the words "God, how I love this girl."  
  
Then one faithful day they broke up. She told me to meet her at the usual spot. When I got there, she ran towards me and cried on my shoulder. They had a big fight, which resulted in their break up. Mixed feelings were boiling inside me. I was happy because she was free and maybe I would have the chance of telling her my true feelings for her but then I was so sad because she is crying her out heart out for him. I was also very angry that Tai had the guts to dump such a wonderful girl. But at that time, I was not quite sure of what I wanted to do.  
  
So we found ourselves doing what we did in the old days, spending our time on a branch of a sakura tree talking about anything. We still enjoyed childish pranks for we are still young at heart.  
  
There were so many opportunities for me to confess my feelings for her but I still couldn't bring myself to. Once I again I was scared of losing her. I lost her once, and now I couldn't bear losing her again by telling how much I love her. So I held in my feelings even if it was bursting to be expressed from my aching heart.  
  
We were seated on our usual spot eating cookies she baked, when she brought up the subject of the JS Prom. "Hey, Matt the prom is on Friday. Who's the lucky girl?"  
  
I looked at her confused, "Lucky girl?"  
  
"Your date for the prom."  
  
"Oh....well....um..I don't have one. How you? Who's the lucky guy?"  
  
"Well I'm dateless, too. How about if we become partners?" she smiled.  
  
My face suddenly became red. I was so shocked. I hadn't expected her to say that. It was like a dream come true. At least even for once, I could hold an angel in my arms. "O-okay.if you say so." Then she smiled and suddenly kissed my cheek. I could hardly contain the joy inside me. I saw her turn red and bow her head. Suddenly she stood up and started to run saying "Last one to the ice cream parlor treats a banana split." I slowed down to let her win which meant having her with me for a couple more hours.  
  
Our prom night finally came. I bought I new tuxedo and almost poured the entire bottle of cologne. TK kept on laughing at the sight at me. I told myself I'll get him back when the night is over. I got in the limo and they drove me to Sora's place. I slowly got out of the car shaking. I rang the doorbell with my shaking finger and her mother answered. She smiled at me and asked me to wait while she went to get Sora. I was in the middle of my thoughts when I heard her call "Matt?" I looked up and saw lovelier than ever with the strapless black dress and her hair flowing around her face. I shakily went over to her and fastened a corsage around her wrist. "To the loveliest girl in the world." She then asked, "Is that true?" I smiled and nodded. She smiled then we turned to leave.  
  
It was like a dream come true. I was there dancing with the only girl I ever loved. She was smiling at me, as we glided on the dance floor. I found myself lost in her sparkling eyes. There were so many things I wanted to tell her at that moment. I wanted to tell her she would always be the light in my darkness. I wanted to tell her that I loved her. I drew in a deep breath and bent down to her ear but suddenly the music stopped and the magic disappeared. I came so close, but I still haven't done it.  
  
We walked towards the table where our friends were. And I told her I would be right back, I was just going to get some drinks. It took me a long time to get the drinks and when I returned she wasn't there. I asked around if they have seen her, but they told me they haven't. As I searched, I reached the garden. I saw two silhouette figures by the moon's silvery light. They were so close to each other. I couldn't describe the pain I was feeling when I recognize the dress that Sora wore. I turned and left.  
  
Since that night, I avoided her. Many times she tried to talk to me but I never gave her the chance. I was afraid that she might say that she loves Tai and not me. I could never hear those dreaded words and feel my hopes crush and my heart break. In the hallways, when she approaches me, I go the other direction. It hurts so much to do this but I thought this would be the best way to forget her. Those months tormented me.  
  
The day of our graduation came. I was planning to go to the U.S. for college. And I was leaving the next day. As the program ended, she came to me and handed me a white rose. As she stared at me, there was something in her eyes that I couldn't describe. There was sadness in them and when she smiled it wasn't the same smile. I wanted to hug her and tell her I love her but she turned and walked away from me.  
  
I moved to the U.S. the next day. And luckily, I got accepted in a university. I would concentrate on my studies but I would still think of her. I was always wondering if she thinks of me too. I tried hard to forget about her, but I still can't stop loving her. Each accomplishment I did was for her. I thought if I will be successful one day then I would be worthy of having her.  
  
A year after our graduation, I decided to return home and see her again. I thought I couldn't stand another day without seeing her. As I got off the plane I wanted to rush to her and hold her in my arms and tell her I love her. This time I was going to tell her how I feel. Nothing can stop me.  
  
As I got home, I saw TK approach me. I smiled but he wasn't acting like his usual self. "Hey Tk, I'm home. But I gotta go to Sora's place." I stopped seeing the sadness in his eyes.  
  
"Follow me, Matt," was all he said. I was a bit confused but I followed him. I realized we were going towards the park where me and Sora always hang out. I smiled at the memory of the kiss she gave me at that tree. Those were the happiest days of my life and I realized that I missed her more than I thought. Then Tk stopped walking and pointed to the sakura tree. "There she is," he whispered.  
  
I looked to where he was pointing and saw a newly dug tomb with the name of the only girl I ever loved. I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. I desperately tried to convince myself that this is a nightmare and I'm going to wake up soon.  
  
I stared at Tk in disbelief with eyes searching for an explanation. He slowly started to say, "It's been a week since she died. She died of Leukemia, but even though she was sick, she never stopped think of you, Matt. Your name was the last thing she said before she died. She asked us to bury her here where she spent her happiest days and that was when she was with you. She also asked me to give you this," he handed me a parcel and with that he left.  
  
I slowly opened it and saw it contained a dried up orchid from the corsage I gave her. I also saw a letter that was dated last month. I opened it with shaking hands and started to read.  
  
Dear Matt,  
  
I know by the time you read this letter, I'm gone. I just wanted to let you know how lucky and thankful that I had a friend like you. I would also like you to know something I've been keeping all these years. I love you, Matt. Not in a friendly way but as one would feel like spending the rest of my life with. I have always loved you from the start. I bloomed each day when you were by my side. When you left I couldn't stop crying because I was afraid that you were with another girl. I wanted you all to myself, I know that it sounds selfish but that's how I feel. Each time you protected me it was like a dream come true, and each time you were by my side, I was in heaven. I did so many things for you will learn to love me but I NEVER saw a hint. I did everything I could to please you because I love you so much. So many nights I've cried myself to sleep when I think that I was unloved by you. You might think that this is all a lie, but I can never lie to you Matt, the one I love most.  
  
I know you might be thinking that when I was with Tai, it was to make you jealous. But it wasn't. It was to make you see me as a young woman capable of loving. Tai agreed to help me even though I know it was against his will. I told him that I love you. Sometimes I imagine that you were jealous and fooled myself that it was a sign that you feel something for me too. When me and Tai broke up, and I came crying to you, I didn't know how you would react and I'll know that you'll love me. But I failed, you didn't give me any clue. On our prom night, you just don't know how happy I was when you gave me the corsage and to me that I was the prettiest. When we were dancing I longed for you to tell me that you loved me, but you NEVER did. And when Tai to ask if there was anything happening between us, I was afraid you might see us talking and get the wrong impression, so I told him we could talk in the garden. I explained the whole thing to him there. What happened next was I found you were missing and later learned that you were looking for me. I concluded that you saw us. The next day I tried to explain but you didn't give me a chance to do so. You continuously avoided me and never knew how much pain I experience at that time. I felt the world crushing me. In our graduation day, when I approached you, I wanted to tell you how much I loved you but I decided I couldn't do it. I could not bear to hear you say that all you feel for me was brotherly love. For I want you to love me as a woman, not as a girl. So I turned away and left.  
  
Though saying I LOVE YOU might be too late, still I want you to know that I will always love you and my heart has been and always will be yours alone.  
  
Always, Sora.  
  
P.S. Think of me sometimes.and always remember that loving you was the best thing that ever happened in my life.  
  
I felt tears falling as I folded the letter. I wanted to shout out to let her know that I love her, if not as much, but more than she did for me. I love her more than anything in this world. I fell to my knees and touched the soil of her grave. Rain started to fall I didn't care. I continued to cry softly and whispered "Oh God, send my love to heaven... Please grant..."  
  
"...my only wish..."  
  
The End  
  
Thanks to all of ya'll who read this story. Now if you don't mind, please review it. It'd help me a great bunch, so I can beat this friend of mine who's a taiora fan. We can show 'em that Sorato rules. YEAH!!!! 


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